Gemini season is here and my inner crazy bitch is excited. As I said before, this month has been really weird. Last summer I felt so connected with myself. I’d just finished high school, I was happy letting the sun kiss my skin and running around downtown Barcelona with my friends trying to find someone who would give us money to buy ice cream. I had no idea what was planned for me in the future, but I sure as hell knew it wouldn’t be this. This year so far has been “blue”. And what I mean with blue is that I’ve been seeing everything through a blue lens. I’m in a moment in my life where I’m not sad, I’m not happy, I’m just blue.
And I want to change that.
WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR I SEE
A girl who wants to get out there and live adventures. A girl who is not afraid to speak out her mind. A girl that knows how to love with her whole heart. A girl that even though cries very often and is not always happy, she knows there is so much beauty out there. She can find beauty everywhere.
WHEN I LOOK INTO MY SOUL I SEE
A girl who doesn’t even know if it exists. She tries to do good things, but sometimes she fails along the way. A girl that is trying to be a better person, to her friends and family, especially her family. All the issues that happened need to be left behind because after all, family is all we got.
WHEN I LOOK INTO MY HEART I SEE
A romantic girl who doesn’t want to fall in love, what a biased answer, huh? I don’t know how to open up to people, and I don’t know how to trust someone else with my feelings.
WHEN I LOOK INTO MY PAST I SEE
A depressed little girl with no desire to live. No one paid attention to her. I’m so damn proud of that girl. She took care of herself and grew up to be the person I am now. All my past mistakes and experiences made me who I am. I’m so happy to think I’m not the same 14-year-old crying in the shower, or the 16-year-old who disconnected her mind and common sense, because that made life so much easier.
WHEN I LOOK INTO MY FUTURE I SEE
A girl with so much future. A girl who will become a woman. A woman with so many talents that she won’t even be able to count them all. A girl who will travel, going to all the places her favorite rock stars or painters have been to. A person who will be content with her life, grateful for what she has, who loves herself and hopefully, who is happy.
Being sad is so 3 years ago 😉